Telemarketers

They always seem to hit at the same time. Dinner time. Any coincidence? No, because we're all at home.
Despite what some would think, I actually try to be courteous to these people until it's time not to be. As gross and as frustrating their job is I understand that they are working and trying to earn a paycheck. I feel that is better & more honorable then receiving a paycheck from The Chrysler. I just try my best not to spend too much time with them.

However, the Telemarketers/Evening callers that I have found new joy in speaking with are....................The Debt Collectors. (no they're not calling for me) (yet)

Apparently some slut named Celia had my phone number before me and didn't like to pay her bills. She probably didn't have a job and probably still doesn't. (bet I know who she'll vote for)

Anyway, these debt collectors call and I immediately paint a picture in my head.

Smoke filled room. Overweight white female or ratty white dude. Rock Star and Kool Menthols on the desk. Meth in the pencil drawer. Now calls me and grills me on the whereabouts of Celia.

No matter what I say or what I've asked, they eventually always call back. Have now for years. So if they're going to call back, I might as well have fun.

"Hi can I speak to Celia?"
"Um...who's calling?"
"That's of a private matter"
"Well you just called my house"
"This is Allied Interstate"
"Allied the Moving company?"
"IS CELIA THERE?"
"No"
"Where is she?"
"How the F do I know cocksucker? She hasn't had this number for the past 4 years, but you methheads continue to call here."
"So you don't know Celia?
"Did I stutter?"
"Why are you getting irate?"
"I'm not, I just don't like you."

......And on and on and on. It's actually a lot of fun. It sharpens the skill of wit. And then when I don't feel like verbal combat, I just save it for another day.